I took my grandson, Soren, to McDonald’s. There were other people there, but really it was Soren and his grandpa. We went to Wal-Mart and got a toy (okay, two), ate lunch at the park, and had a cool time!
You see, this kid has got me all googly inside. Lanette and I talk about him when he’s not around, and we go through Soren withdrawal if we don’t see him for a while. I even signed him up for the Hot Wheels Redline Club so he can have a collection of Hot Wheels like Grandpa. Continue reading Saturdays With Soren
My friend Steve showed up at church Sunday and said he was in such a rush that he had to glance down to make sure his underwear wasn’t on the outside of his pants. Thankfully, that was not the case and we could continue our conversation without the awkward embarrassment only a grown man with underwear over jeans can bring. My kids used to wear their underwear over their sweats, but they also had a towel pinned around their neck and made superhero noises. I checked Steve’s neck, no towel, so he wasn’t channeling his inner Superman.
And why does Superman wear his undies outside of his tights? Maybe that was the style on Krypton. Somebody needed to clue him in that we don’t do things like that here. Continue reading Steve And His Underwear
Sorry, folks, there isn’t anything funny in today’s post. I tried to come up with a way to couch the message in some kind of allegory or illustration. I tried to think of a humorous anecdote to introduce this subject. The problem is that we dance around this issue too much, we try too hard to talk carefully about it. We find ways to excuse it, to justify it, to somehow lessen its impact. The problem is, we can’t.
The dictionary defines adultery as, “voluntary sexual activity between a married man and someone other than his wife or between a married woman and someone other than her husband.” The problem with that definition is that it is incomplete. Continue reading Adultery
I think my football team is going to shape up pretty well. I’m not crazy about my quarterback, but my running backs and defense are top flight. I think the Desert Sharks are going to be pretty good this year.
I won’t actually be down on a field this year, although I will be in the booth for local high school games. I am going to do the 95.3FM the Edge broadcasts with Todd Evangelist on Friday nights. Todd and I are both football nuts, so the broadcasts should be a lot of fun. So if I won’t be coaching football, what is all this talk about my team? I’m talking about the Third Option Men fantasy football league, of course. Continue reading Fantasy Football And My Heart
We were a bunch of high school kids dreaming of gridiron glory. As freshmen we were at the bottom of the football totem pole. The varsity players looked at us as though someone had breathed life into tree moss. We were the newbies, the punks, the pretenders and poseurs.
The first day of practice we all walked out of the locker room fully dressed in our gear. Then we noticed that the varsity guys carried their stuff out to the field and dressed after calisthenics. The next day, the freshmen all carried their gear out, too. We were just like them. Continue reading The Chaw
How do you measure greatness? Is it by the amount of money a person has or dies with? Do you measure it by friends or popularity? I once heard a definition of greatness that basically said you don’t compare that person with anyone, they are the person that everyone else must compare to.
I grew up idolizing Dick Butkus, the great Chicago Bears linebacker. I practiced tackling like him, I wore his number, I did everything I could to emulate him and his style of play. I even taped my fingers together because I saw a “Sport” magazine picture where he had done it. I didn’t know why he had done it, I just knew that he had, so I did. You didn’t compare Butkus to other players, you compared them to him. And the others always came away wanting. Butkus was the epitome of greatness at his position. Continue reading The Measure Of Greatness
“The sky is falling!”
“Wear a helmet so a 300 pound piece of space junk won’t hit you and crush your skull.”
If you were watching the news last week you saw these warnings and many others. If you weren’t paying attention, here’s what was happening. A school bus-sized 6 ton satellite had lost its orbit, and the result was that it was going to come crashing to earth. Continue reading What? Me Worry?
Thirty years ago on September 12, 1983, Lanette Irene Sanford had what can only be described as a HUGE lapse of judgment, and followed through with our wedding. One of her sisters had tried to talk her out of it, but she persisted!
Over the years we have raised two children, been on staff at numerous churches, raised a ton of dogs, cats, hamlobsters and fish. Continue reading Lanette Must Be Crazy!
“I know it sounds cruel, but if he’s going to do something, he should divorce her and start all over again, but make sure she has custodial care and somebody looking after her…” Pat Robertson on the 700 Club. Robertson went on to say that Alzheimer’s was a kind of death, so your marriage vows are fulfilled.
You’re wrong, Pat, dead wrong. Continue reading Really, Pat, Really?
I was supposed to write this a while ago, but I kept putting it off. You know, I was busy; I had stuff to do. I couldn’t take the time to sit down and clear my head long enough to write a post.
There were a lot of important things that needed to be done. How could I possibly consider doing anything else, like writing a post? The air in my tires needed changing, the muffler bearings on my Mustang needed to be serviced, and the radiator on my wife’s ’69 VW Beetle needed to be flushed. Too much stuff to do, too little time. Continue reading Procrastination