In February I turned 55 years old. That means I have been on this planet for over 20,000 days or 28,987,200 minutes! I was going to figure out how many seconds it is, but my calculator started smoking while trying to figure it out. I am running out of boxes on forms. I have gone from the 18-30 year old box to the 55 and over box. They don’t have any more boxes after that! Needless to say, I have been here a while.
But how many of my days have actually been significant? I can pick out a few huge ones. The day my wife (impossible though it may be to believe) consented to marry me. The birth of my two boys and the first moments I held my grandchildren are incredibly significant in my life. The day my grandfather prayed for me at my ordination service was a day I will never forget.
I have put together a life full of great moments. I have stood on the mouth of an open volcano in Nicaragua, I have ministered to crowds big and small. I have owned some incredible cars, I have coached championship teams, and maybe most importantly, I have been able to watch God change people’s lives in my ministry.
The problem is that my moments don’t always add up to days. How many days have I wasted being angry or hurt? How much time have I spent doing things that were selfish or downright wrong? How many opportunities have I missed to show love, give grace, or forgive? Were there times I could have done more, talked less or modeled God better? Of that I am certain.
And what about the days I have left? With medical science continuing to make strides in keeping us alive I could live another 55 years. I am pretty sure the angels that have to watch over me just shuddered at that thought! I think they were looking forward to having me, um, shuffle off this mortal coil so they could get a rest! No such luck, guys, I am sticking around a little while longer at least!
How will I spend my remaining days, however many they may be? Psalm 90:12 says, “Teach us to keep account of our days so we may develop inner wisdom.” (ISV) It is good for us to stop and look at our lives every now and then.
I want to spend the rest of my life being positive. It isn’t easy. We live in a negative world. Talk radio ad television blare negativity into my brain, and if I’m not careful I can adopt their attitudes as my own.
I see people all the time who spend all of their time devoted to being angry or feeling bad about people. They spend precious hours reliving each personal slight, plotting revenge, or wallowing in self-pity. In the end, they only hurt themselves. They are inevitably sour people, no fun to be around, and hurt others who try to help them. In their anger they alienate the people who are trying to love and help them. This makes them more angry, more sour, and more alone. It’s just not worth it.
I am looking forward to days spent loving God, my wife and my kids and grandkids. I am hoping to make a mark in this world big enough that people say, “That had to be God, Jerry Godsey isn’t that good!”
Another version of Psalm 90:12 puts it like this: “Teach us to realize the brevity of life…” 55 years doesn’t seem brief, but my life is just an infinitesimal speck in the timeline of history. I hoping my next few years will make my speck even bigger.
Looking forward to more days with Soren and Ellie… Jerry